Friday, March 15, 2013

I Started...


...writing my book yesterday. Out of nowhere, I just knew where it should start, which is something I struggled with deciding. However, deciding on where to start wasn't the number one reason for my procrastination. It truly hit me as I completed the very first page why I've been putting it off.

It's hard to write down the things that I've experienced in the past without getting emotional. It's weird the stuff that I was able to recall that I haven't even thought about in a ridiculous number of years. It truly feels like I'm getting reacquainted with myself and I have this weird feeling of being split into two people...if that makes any sense.

I don't feel sorry for myself; that's not what causes the emotional upset. A part of me feels that it's due to the fact that I know that there are young people going through what I went through, right now even, and it hurts my heart. No one should have to live through that...

But this book isn't going to be an autobiography. I'm using my life to make a "fiction-based-on-true-events" type of thing. I think it's the safest course to take...

Anyway, for those of you who care, please pray for me through this process. My goal is to finish the book by the end of the year.

Have a great weekend!

Until next time,

XOXOXO - Jessika

Wednesday, March 6, 2013

Husbandless Weekend Part 2

The weekend ended up being a lot more fun and interesting than I expected. On Friday night, everyone else was in bed when I got home from work, which was good for me because all I wanted to do was eat and go to sleep.

On Saturday morning, my sister came over and we went to the Ulta grand opening in my area. I dropped my Jada and Noah off with one of their friends at the nearby movie theatre, at which time a second friend showed up. They couldn't decide on a movie, so after my sister and I left Ulta with a couple bags full of goodies, I took them to Annapolis Mall.

My sister and I ate at Fuddruckers and talked for like two hours. It's amazing how much we have in common and how easy it is for us to talk about ANYTHING. She has never been as open with me as she was this weekend and it meant a lot. After we ate, we left to go back to my house and we talked even more. I didn't want her to leave!!! And she didn't want to leave either, but she had to get back home to her toddler. But, she'll be back this weekend! Yay!!!

After she left, I took my Jaylen to Chipotle where we got a couple of burrito bowls to go. We ate very briefly together at the kitchen table before he was out of here with his girlfriend. I waited about 10 to 15 minutes then I took off back to the mall to pick up the four kids since they were apparently having so much fun they weren't planning to call me to get them! I absolutely loved that they spent most of the time all four of them together instead of the girls being separated from the boys. I surprised them with chocolate chip cookies and my son's friend exclaimed that he "loved me" in response:). Before taking the two friends home, I took them to 7-11 to get drinks.

On Sunday, my mom came over and we went to church. Church felt weird without my husband there to play the drums, but it was okay. Afterwards, we went to East Moon Asian Bistro of course! The food was as excellent as always! We then came home because Jaylen had to go to work at 4:00 p.m.

Later in the evening, my mom, Jada and I went to Food Lion to buy pork chops and rice to make for dinner. My mom made the rice and Jada made the pork chops and they were DE-LI-CIOUS! Her cooking skills amaze me!!!

We kinda chilled out the rest of the night in front of the TV and went to bed.

I had to work on Monday and I didn't expect to see my husband until I got home. But then he surprised me by coming to the office straight from the airport!! I was so incredibly excited to see him!!! We rode home together and ate leftovers from the night before and he told everyone about his historically significant trip!

This morning, after waking up at 5:00 a.m. and taking a shower, I found out that I didn't have to go to work. Sigh. What a waste! The kids didn't have school either...DOUBLE WASTE!! The weather was nowhere near deserving of a day off for them! I can't really speak on the conditions in DC and Arlington, which is where our federal government offices are located. Anyway, my husband and I had trouble going back to sleep so we decided to get up and go grocery shopping in "preparation for the still-allegedly-coming-storm-that-actually-never-happened-afterall-dagnabbit!

My mom is still here so we invited her to come with us. Jason treated us to IHOP before we shopped and the food was good but too much so we couldn't finish it. My mom's breakfast was the tiniest so she was able to almost-finish hers.

Wal-mart was almost dead when we got there and everything was well-stocked, so that was a blessing. I did hear that they were SLAMMED the night before, though, so I'm glad we didn't go last night like I originally wanted to do.

This entry was truly boring but I wanted to write it anywayz...

Until next time,

XOXOXO - Jessika

Monday, March 4, 2013

Husbandless Weekend :(

My edible husband is headed to Atlanta, GA and then to Birmingham, AL to paint at the Congressional Pilgrimage to Selma. He'll be gone until Monday afternoon. Please keep him in prayer! This is only one of prayerfully-many-more-to-come-opportunities for him to be a blessing through his art, and I'm so very proud of him! I know that it's going to be a super-duper blessed experience!!!

This will be our longest separation since August of 2007, which was when he went to Lagos, Nigeria with his family for a church mission. We weren't married (and therefore, not living together) then, so the separation wasn't AS terrible as this one might be for me.

I don't mind being away from him for a time because it gives us the ability to miss each other. Also, I rather enjoy spending time alone. The hardest part for me, I think, will be at night. I sleep so much better, so much more peacefully, with him next to me...

Another thing that will be difficult for ME is dealing with the kids. See, he's the "fun" parent. He's adventurous and gets us to go out and do things - to be honest, just being AROUND him, even if it's just to watch TV, is fun because he's so funny and engaging. You know how normal people just space out while watching TV, even with others in the room with them, even during commercials? My husband's not like that. He'll talk to the TV, make jokes about what's happening or see a weird-looking character on the screen and say, "Look at your mommy, Ha!" or "Look at Noah's wife! Ha!" (Noah's my 14 year old son.) With him gone, the kids are going to be ridiculously bored out of their minds unless I think of something interesting for them to do. And that's hard for me because I could be holed up in my room all day playing with my nail polishes or makeup, watching romantic comedies starring British actors all day long and be happy as can be...

I know, it sounds terribly selfish....

I was thinking about going to my bro's house to visit, but he and his wife won't be there. My mom's babysitting his kids for him and it feels weird to go visit someone's house without the owners of said house being present. It feels like a violation or something...so I don't know....

Until next time,

XOXOXO - Jessika

(This post was published late for safety reasons. Didn't want people knowing the man of the house was gone for the weekend.)