Sunday, September 30, 2012

Power of the Tongue

I was sitting in the kitchen watching my husband chop jalapenos for the spicy spaghetti he's making when I got the sudden urge to write. There's no telling what this entry is going to be about, so...

My husband spoke at church today, which for our church, was Youth Sunday. He spoke about something that we've all heard before, but that is well worth repeating. The topic was The Power of the Tongue.

The power of the words that come out of our mouth is not something to be underestimated. The most amazing thing about this truth is that it is true about the way things work in this world regardless of whether or not you're a Christian. It's a truth that we can't be reminded enough about, as it's easily forgotten as we live our day to day lives.

People create a lot of energy around themselves and others a lot of times under the guise of "joking around." That foolish or idle talk we call "playing around" with our peers can be extremely dangerous. Sometimes we even laugh at the things that people say about us in a "joking" matter that we later find left a "mark" or "seed" in us that can actually take root.

Proverbs 26: 18 Like a madman who throws firebrands, arrows, and death,
19 Is the man who deceives his neighbor, And says, “I was only joking!”

That saying, "birds of a feather flock together," meaning that people of the same mind and/or lifestyle tend to stick together, BECOMES true even if you didn't think you were a certain way when you first started hanging with a certain type of group. For example, maybe you weren't a drinker or smoker, but you love football. You find a group of drinkers/smokers who also love football that you thought were "cool," so you decide to hang around them just to watch football every once in a while. I guarantee that after a while you will start to drink, smoke, or both.

For those in school, you can't call yourself nice and be best friends with a mean or boy-crazy girl without becoming a mean or boy-crazy girl yourself. You can't call yourself a Christian and hang with atheists and not eventually begin to doubt your faith, too. You can't strive to be an A-student and hang out with flunkies, can't maintain a "clean" lifestyle by hanging out with drug users. In order to succeed in this world, on the path that you tell yourself you wish to be on, you have to attach yourself to people who are moving in the same direction. And if your intent is to be a positive influence in the midst of all of that negativity, make sure that you're strong enough in mind, body, spirit and FAITH to do so...which, at school-age, is a rarity...I mean, most adults can't handle negative atmospheres and rise above them.

It is because of this that we also need to be mindful of what it is we allow ourselves to see and hear on television and our surroundings.

Proverbs 23:For as he thinks in his heart, so is he.

Let's be honest, we're not going to be able to avoid absolutely every negative and ungodly vision or word or activity in the world. We have sin thrown at us from every angle being glorified and called "the new normal." Which is why it is SO, SO, SO very important to have a support system of like-minded, like-faith-ded:) people to call on when we're feeling weak and/or tempted. It is also imperative that we don't go to bed at night without asking God to wash and cancel out every ungodly thing we've been exposed to each and every day. And, there's no better way to wash away the "world" than to dive into the Word of God on a very, VERY regular basis (preferably daily, several times a day).

You may think that salvation and right-living are for your benefit alone. I hate to burst your bubble, but God rarely if EVER blesses us without expectation that what He's done for and IN you will also bless others. Even the mere spoken testimony of what He's done can bless someone in a way that you may never know.

People watch us every day. You were made to be a beacon of hope and inspiration to others. When you fail to speak, walk, LIVE as God intended, you also cause a multitude of others to fail right along with you...

Stop being selfish.

Think about it.

Until Next Time,



Friday, September 28, 2012

My Husband

I LOVE my husband...

That's nothing new, right? I was thinking about just how much today after remembering a boy who had the hugest crush on me when I was in living in Alexandria, VA, in fifth or sixth grade. He literally just popped into my head out of nowhere. His name was Luis Martinez. He was stocky and had a mole on his face that I know if I saw today, I wouldn't it think was a big deal. Back then, however, in my superficial jerky days, I thought it was "gross," and because of it, I never gave him the time of day. The crazy thing is, I haven't thought about this boy since I was still a child...

(Luis Martinez, if by some miracle you ever find this, I am sorry for treating you the way I did back then. I sincerely pray that you've met, or that you will meet, a really nice girl to love and marry and have children with, and that you're living happily. God bless you! And to anyone else out there that I might have hurt or mistreated, please accept my sincerest apologies!!)

Luis was the sweetest, kindest boy I'd known at that time of my life - and since, until I met Jason - and the only boy I can remember who pursued the heck out of me, no matter how much I brushed him off and/or mistreated him. He wasn't just nice to me and wanted to be around me, he told me, on a very, very regular basis just how much he liked me and wanted me to be his girlfriend. I had never been pursued that openly and persistently before or after him - again, until I met my husband. Guys have shown their interest in me plenty of times, yes, but usually it was subtle or inconsistent, you know? It takes commitment for a guy to put himself completely out there, to not care about what anyone thinks, to choose to spend every free moment with you or in pursuit of you and ONLY you.

Thinking about how badly I treated Luis, I started to think about a lot of the mistakes I've made over the years. How badly I've treated a LOT of people back then, boys and girls, friends and strangers, how many ridiculously awful decisions I made, how many opportunities I wasted, etc. If given the opportunity, I would go back and live my life all over again. When I thought about how amazing that opportunity would be earlier today, the one thing that I knew for 100 percent sure, is that I still would have wanted to meet and marry Jason.

The way he loves me is incomprehensible. I honestly don't think it's even human for a man to love me the way Jason loves me. Please don't misunderstand what I'm doing here by sharing this: I am not bragging about this or trying to make anyone feel badly. What I'm saying here is that the fierceness of Jason's love for me has absolutely nothing to do with what I did to or for him. I know that if God didn't do it, I'd still be super single.

I spent so many years thinking that being single was my destiny - and I thought I was perfectly happy and satisfied with that. There was no sadness or regret or anything remotely resembling bitterness with my acceptance of that "fact." But God...(trying not to cry here)...for some reason, God felt that it was absolutely necessary for me to be loved by a man on this earth, and as such, He must have taken over Jason's heart and body and mind in order to make that happen.

You've heard the line in a Tyler Perry movie or seven, but my husband's love for me is a reflection of God's love for me. It is unconditional. Entire. Complete. NOT EARNABLE!!! There is nothing I could have possibly done to or for Jason that would make him love me the way he does. NOTHING. Just like there is absolutely nothing I could have possibly done, or could ever possibly do, to deserve God's love and His Salvation - and yet I have them.

You know what? I take it back: if I could live my life all over again, I WOULD NOT. I THANK GOD for my past and the path that led me to my husband. I wouldn't change a thing!!! If it hadn't been for all of the bad experiences I've had along the way, I never would have been able to appreciate him...I totally married a "nice guy."   True, Jason's not your typical nice guy; he's fun and funny and NEVER boring, but he is a nice guy, and God gave me the presence of mind and heart to receive this special gift.


Until Next Time,



Wednesday, September 26, 2012

"Big Three Free"

I'm working on four hours of sleep here, people. I cannot be held accountable for what I'm about to write (at this moment I haven't a clue what that will be...).

Nothing important to report, but, yesterday I discovered something about a super inexpensive nail polish that I've been purchasing a lot as of late: Sinful Colors. Did you know that Sinful Colors nail polish, regularly priced at $1.99 or less is "Big Three Free," meaning, it doesn't contain formaldehyde, toluene or dibutyl phthalate (DBP)? I guess I shouldn't think of this as that big of a deal since almost everyone's going "big three free" these days, but, I don't know of any other nail polishes that cost TWO DOLLARS or less that fall within that category. Here is some info on the harmful effects of these ingredients:

Toluene: Toluene should not be inhaled due to its health effects. Low to moderate levels can cause tiredness, confusion, weakness, drunken-type actions, memory loss, nausea, loss of appetite, and hearing and color vision loss. These symptoms usually disappear when exposure is stopped. Inhaling high levels of toluene in a short time may cause light-headedness, nausea, or sleepiness. It can also cause unconsciousness, and even death. - (Source:

DBP: DBP was added to the California Proposition 65 (1986) list of suspected teratogens in November 2006. It is a suspected endocrine disruptor. It was used in some nail polishes; all major producers began eliminating this chemical from nail polishes in the Fall of 2006. (Teratology is the study of abnormalities of physiological development. It is often thought of as the study of human birth defects, but it is much broader than that, taking in other non-birth developmental stages, including puberty; and other non-human life forms, including plants. A newer term developmental toxicity includes all manifestations of abnormal development, not only frank terata. These may include growth retardation or delayed mental development without any structural malformations.[1]) - (Source:

Formaldehyde: Occupational exposure to formaldehyde by inhalation is mainly from three types of sources: thermal or chemical decomposition of formaldehyde-based resins, formaldehyde emission from aqueous solutions (for example, embalming fluids), and the production of formaldehyde resulting from the combustion of a variety of organic compounds (for example, exhaust gases). Formaldehyde can be toxic, allergenic, and carcinogenic.[4] Because formaldehyde resins are used in many construction materials it is one of the more common indoor air pollutants.[29] At concentrations above 0.1 ppm in air formaldehyde can irritate the eyes and mucous membranes, resulting in watery eyes.[30] Formaldehyde inhaled at this concentration may cause headaches, a burning sensation in the throat, and difficulty breathing, and can trigger or aggravate asthma symptoms.[31][32] - (Source:

Well, it turns out this blog has turned into a public service announcement.

You're welcome:).

Until Next Time,



Friday, September 21, 2012


I have a few free minutes here at work and almost returned to watching back to back episodes of Seinfeld; but then a little voice in my head said, "You should write." So, here I am.

I unsubscribed from my favorite youtuber because of a comment - or as she might call it, a "joke" - that she made about God on Twitter a few days ago (I also stopped following her on Tumblr and Twitter and unliked her FB page). I know that it probably makes me incredibly judgmental and over-reactive, but I don't much care.

Speaking of being over-reactive, man, I really have been extremely emotional lately. I don't know what's happened. It's like a tear-well inside of me has sprung a leak and crying has become way too easy. There have been situations here and there that have caused me enough despair to cry - and I've even felt like I NEEDED to cry - yet when it came down to it, my eyes wouldn't let the tears go. I literally felt like I was emotionally constipated, if such a thing even exists. Meanwhile, an emotional person on a show or in a movie could incite me to cry almost instantly...go figure.

Some insensitive person out there might say, "You're probably entering the early stages of menopause or have some other hormonal imbalance," and to them I say, WHATEVER. I tell you what I think it is: as I have previously mentioned, I recently went through some stuff that has caused me to see myself and my relationships in a whole new light; probably the light that I should have seen them in from the beginning. In other words, I am taking some aspects of my life more seriously. Things that I used to ignore or internalize (as a result of which I'd become bitter and hold grudges for much longer than is healthy), I no longer do...

Saying that just made me think of the stories I've read about or have seen on TV about why people break up. You often hear, "It wasn't any one big thing, it was just a lot of little things..." I also remember being told to never go to bed angry. Those things didn't sound like that much of a big deal back when I first heard them, but now, I see how they can really destroy any kind of relationship if not properly considered.

I myself have had a habit of responding to situations that hurt or angered me by internalizing my feelings and keeping quiet - even if asked, BEGGED to share what I was thinking/feeling, I'd keep my mouth shut. After a while, I'd "get over it," or at least, it would feel like I got over it. The truth is, I'd simply bury those things inside of myself to be recalled at any given moment, to the extent that it would become added fuel to very tiny fires that may spring up, making ordinarily small or even insignificant "sparks" turn into the emotional equivalent of forest wildfires...

I highly recommend to everyone who is in an important relationship, whether it be romantic, friendly or familial, to please take the time to talk your issues out as they arise. Don't let fear or insecurity stop you from expressing how you feel. This is not to say that every random thought that pops into your head should be expressed. But, if something that has been said or done to you has left a mark on your heart, you owe it to yourself and the person you care about to let it be known...

In other words, don't give those sparks permission to become more than what they are - stomp them out IMMEDIATELY...

Until Next Time...



Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

Getting Over a Rough Patch


I started to get extremely worried; worried in a way that was in no way healthy and left me feeling completely helpless. I quite literally thought, felt like my life, as I knew it, was about to be turned completely upside down...

There was a point where the issue was so overwhelming that I got a little angry at God because I felt like He was allowing this to happen as a way to "force" me to come to Him - and I resented it. The result of ALL of this was that I hurt and cried more in one night than I've cried and hurt in the last three years combined.

One could say I'm a bit stubborn. Okay, more like stubborn as a bull. I don't claim to know everything, but I have a pretty good understanding of what it is I should and shouldn't do and say. Sometimes (a lot of times), however, I don't actually succeed in putting those things that I know into action.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen, I have displayed all of the telltale signs of one who lacks WISDOM.

I desire I prayed for it and believe that it will be given to me - and that plenty of opportunities to display my newly acquired gift will follow...

You could say that my recently overcome rough patch was the equivalent to having a huge, brightly-lit mirror staring me in my face, and I didn't like what I saw. What I saw made me remorseful, embarrassed, and ready to be forgiven - not only by those I've hurt, not only by God, but by MYSELF, too.

It's funny how the things we're "supposed" to do in life, the "right" things, seem to be the hardest to start doing. Yet, those things make you feel better about yourself than the wrong things will ever make you feel. Interestingly enough, the "wrong" things are much easier to do and KEEP doing than the right ones are.

This world is so backwards. I can't wait to go HOME...

Until Next Time,



Monday, September 10, 2012

Slackin' Already...

...but I forgive myself.

I've been home for too long. I had to take the day off Friday for Noah and took the day off again today. I actually MISS work, which never happens; can't wait to go back tomorrow.

Things have been a little "off" with me lately. I'd blame it on my period but there are some things that simply can't be brushed under that bloody rug. There need to be some things about me that don't change, regardless of my hormonal imbalances. God is always constant; the closer I get to Him, the more consistent I will be in all things.

I'm getting over the beauty guru thing on youtube. I'm sick of tutorials and suggestions on what I should spend my hard-earned money on, too. I have more makeup than I know what to do with already; I should give/throw 85 percent of it away. However, what usually happens when I get sick of something and give it away, whether it be makeup or handbags, I end up missing the thing/wishing I never gave it away weeks/months later.

I don't even know why I ever got into this stuff. I don't wear that much makeup and I'm watching videos with girls completely hidden behind masks of foundation and powder and eyeshadow and whatever trying to tell me what I should buy to put on my skin. I'm not saying there is anything "wrong" with what they're doing; but if I should watch a video, it should be of someone who promotes more natural, breathing skin on a day to day basis. I do like eyeshadow, but it's too much work to bother with every single day. I don't know how they do it. I suppose some of these girls can't help it; I'm assuming if you're always taking pictures and are on film, you "have" to wear foundation and extra stuff on your face. I don't know.

Why am I rambling away about makeup?

I'm having communication issues with someone close to me. It's like anything requiring more than five words out of my mouth (or my fingers in a text message) turns into some kind of argument or provocation to negative or snide comments. I don't recall it ever being THIS hard to talk to this person. There's obviously an underlying issue; the question is whether or not I care to get to the heart of it. I'm leaning towards NO.

Until next time,


Wednesday, September 5, 2012

Long Time No Blog

Geez, where have I been? Once again, lost in youtube and other non-important things like nail polishing, nail polish organizing, nail polish shopping, nail polish lusting-after and so on an so forth...

It's after 6:00 p.m. and I JUST finished doing all of my work for today. Sigh.

So, I'm on a mission to not be so interested in nail polish anymore (though I'm still anxiously awaiting that second Zoya shipment that I ordered using my sis's account with the bogo free promo). I just got over my handbag obsession and to prove it, I purposely SKIPPED my Little Black Bag this month, even though there were several items that caught my eye, just to show The Handbag who's boss! I think I'll cancel altogether...hmm..will I be able to get away with that?...hold on...YES! I was able to call them and cancel. I'm FREE!!!!!!!!!!!! (NOTHING against LBB, okay? I think it's awesome, just trying to break these chains!!!!)

I really do annoy myself with my back to back obsessions/addictions. It's not Godly in any way, shape or form. I have a sound and self-controlled mind and wallet and I CAN stop spending them on foolishness...

A thought that keeps entering my mind is death. Yes, death. Aside from the fact that I've dreamt twice in less than three weeks that a serial killer was after me (the first one actually caught me and held me prisoner but I escaped only to have him chase me again with a chainsaw), I keep seeing myself being lowered into the ground and yet still having thoughts like, "I bought all those bags and polishes and I won't need a single one of them where I'm going! I won't even think about them there!"

It seems crazy to think like that but I've been doing it more and more. I'll be engaged in one activity or another and my mind keeps saying, "None of this will matter in the end, in the long run, etc." There is so much that I do and say on a day to day basis that simply doesn't mean ANYTHING to ANYONE - especially not to God - yet, I can and DO spend hours and hours and hours and more hours doing it. However, let me spend a few minutes reading the bible or praying and I can't stop yawning and/or aching to take a nap.

I abhor satan!!!!

But I can't give him all the credit. He wouldn't know what to tempt me with if I didn't give into the temptations so consistently, now would he? God doesn't care about what I'm wearing, doesn't care about my makeup routine, or how my nails look or how on-trend I am or amen't ("amen't," meaning, "am not;" another word in my yet-unreleased book, "New-Jessika's Dictionary of Made-Up Words"). And that's another thing, I'm already sick of this Mrsmorphosis moniker. I just want to write as myself, Jessika Blount. Is that crazy? (I really do want an answer to that)

I'm getting older. I've given up the Facebook games I used to play for at least a month now, but it's time for me to forreal-forreal take back my life and get some discipline in ALL things: attitude, shopping, food intake, shopping, exercise, shopping, the words that come out of my mouth, shopping, watching youtube videos, shopping...

In short, I'm not happy with the person I am today because I know I can be, was made to be, BETTER than this. I guess I always feel like this; to be honest, I'd rather feel like this than to think that I'm a-ok just the way I am, like those self-delusional jerkazoids (MY word, don't use it!) who make everyone around them sick with their attitudes, disposition, whatever, yet walk around thoroughly self-satisfied and/or thinking they're God's gift to humanity...

Don't misunderstand me, I don't think "lowly" of myself, and I don't think that the way I am makes God or anyone else hate me, I'm just sayin' there's room for some improvements, and I'm ready to make them...

Until Next Time,