Monday, November 5, 2012

Being Extra Grateful, Day 5: My Daughter

Today, I thank You, God, for my daughter, Jada. As a mother of boys for so many years, having left the child bearing idea behind, yet also wishing I had a girl, there was something of a hole in my spirit until she came into my life.

It wasn't just her entering it that did it for me. It was how she took to me so easily and started calling me mommy nearly three years before my husband and I even got married - before I even knew whether or not that would ever happen.

I'd lacked confidence in the ability to mother a female child, and when she began to call me Mommy, I discouraged it the best I could without hurting her feelings. I told her it wasn't necessary to call me that, especially since I wasn't married to her daddy. She said it felt "right" to call me mommy and she really wanted to do it anyway.

The letters she has written me, my God, I've never read more heartfelt words! I think she wrote me her first letter when she was seven or eight years old, and tears just streamed down my face at the love in it. She has an amazing ability to express her emotions in writing. Her talent in that regard only makes her feel even more like my own daughter.

I remember a couple of weeks after Jason and I got married, I had a court date with my oldest son's father regarding child support on the first day of school. Jada was not able to be enrolled into school the same day as she registered because the school needed "time to get her put into the system and create a schedule." So, I had to take her with me to the courthouse. As we waited, I  pulled out the enrollment forms for health insurance that I needed to complete in order to add my new hubby and daughter. Jada watched me and it hurt my heart like crazy to be forced to call her my "stepdaughter" on the stupid form. It took me forever to complete that part and when Jada saw the word, she said, "Aww, man, you put stepdaughter!" I apologized and explained to her that it had to be done. Ugh, I HATED IT!!! We don't refer to each other as step-ANYTHING!!!

In the car on the way home, I started craving lemon cupcakes, and she and I came up with the idea to make our own strawberry lemonade cupcakes using crushed up strawberry Jolly Ranchers! They were delicious, tasted something like Fruity Pebbles, but something about the way the Jolly Ranchers melted into the icing was too weird for me...we never did them again. I literally JUST NOW remembered that as I was writing this...that's really something...

Jada now has her own cupcake business called Epic Cakes 101 and actually has a seasonal "Strawberry Lemonade" cupcake with REAL strawberries that is absolutely amazing!!! 


Until next time,